Macklemore’s Camping Horror Story: The Boy Scouts



It was a calm and sunny day.

A group of 12-year old kids, including Macklemore himself, experienced heavy bouts of boredom in the woods near Mount Rainier, Washington. Hanging around the cabin exhausted their imaginations.

They gazed upon a nearby bell. It wasn’t an ordinary bell. Locals only rang the bell whenever a fire started.

The kids ignored that rule. Boredom consumed their hearts. They rang the bell and fled. Unbeknownst to them, there were consequences to their actions.

Boy Scouts are trained outdoor survivalists. Fast, strong and possessing more fitness than average kids. You don’t mess with them.

Boy Scouts witnessed the boys’ actions and weren’t amused. The moment the boys escaped into the woods, the Scouts’ instincts kicked in. Like a wolf chasing prey that runs.

A chase ensued. The boys heard the Scouts pounding the dirt behind them, shoving branches out of the way and hopping over stones. As the boys’ exhaustion kicked in, the gap between them and the Scouts decreased. One by one they tripped on the ground, breathing hard and shaking with fear. As they rose from hard soil, a circle of Scouts surrounded them.

Macklemore gazed into each of their fiery eyes. He stared at their steel-toe boots, dusty knees and worn-out khakis covered with spots of brown and red. One of them formed a smirk and stepped forward. “Why did you ring our bell?” the Scout asked.

“I-I-I don’t know,” Macklemore stammered.

The Scout stepped further even more. Macklemore recognized the smell of burnt meat emanating from the kid’s mouth. He observed pieces of steak trapped between the kid’s teeth as the Scout talked. “Who are you?!”

Macklemore cleared his throat, trembling even more when he noticed a short knife strapped on the side of the Scout’s trousers. “Nobody. Just v-visiting.”

“You all better watch yourself. Ring that bell again and we’ll cook all of you on our BBQ grill.” Like a pack of hunting animals, they fled up the trail and were gone within seconds.

This is an exaggeration of Macklemore’s “camping horror story” that he described to PEOPLE magazine. The rapper partnered with Columbia, an infamous outdoor brand that sells gear, to generate awareness about how chemicals on our clothing can harm the environment. Check out his video promoting the OutDry ECO Jacket that’s made up of recycled plastic bottles.

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